In our world, gender expectations play a big role in society as people establish a set of standard

rules for how individuals should act, behave, or appear based on their gender. These expectations

influence people socially, economically, and even personally, and create dynamics that affect many

aspects of life. To better discuss how these expectations operate, I interviewed my coworker Ari,

who is 24 years old. Ari grew up in a Southern American suburban environment in a family that

was both Jewish and atheist, with a father in the military. Ari identifies as AFAB nonbinary but

presents femininely. Although considering herself a southerner, which comes through in her

accent, she does not hold deep South traditions. Beyond her cultural identity, Ari is also part of

several subcultures. She is a PC gamer, enjoys reading fantasy books, and also creates art both

digitally and 2D with markers. The interview took place at a nearby park on a Sunday afternoon,

where the calm atmosphere and soft background music made it easier to have an open and

comfortable conversation. An analysis of Ari’s experiences and perspectives reveals the powerful

role of gender expectations in shaping social, economic, and personal aspects of identity.

To begin, Ari shared her own experiences as a child, where she grew up in an environment

where her father was the breadwinner and her mother was more present in the household. She

highlighted that her mom has had the greatest impact on her life, as she spent more time with her

at home. She believed that not only did her mother play her role, but it was also influenced by

gender, as it is common for the mother to be the caregiver in a household. In the personal sphere,

gender expectations often influence how individuals balance their careers and family

responsibilities. We discussed women choosing a career over a family or vice versa, and also an

increasing number of men are choosing to stay home or participate more in caregiving duties. She

used her mother as an example, who, despite having children, got the chance to work on her career;

as of today, her mother works in the healthcare sector while her children are now adults and living their lives. From

her belief, people should be able to choose what is in their best interest and don’t necessarily have to follow

society’s rules.

Beyond personal spheres, gender expectations extend into economic spheres where men and

women face different pressures regarding career advancement, the labor market, and professional

roles. Ari noted that gender roles are more apparent in the workplace, as women often face more

difficulty finding jobs and accessing greater opportunities. She also mentioned a gap in labor

wages in certain sectors. We discussed that for many in our society, success is defined as making

money for men and starting a family for women, yet women are judged more harshly than men for the

choices they make in balancing these roles.

Gender expectations also play a significant role in social spheres, shaping how individuals

interact, learn, and participate in community life. She observed that children are often guided

toward gendered behaviors through toys and play, where girls are given dolls while boys are given

cars or sports balls, which influences what they come to see as acceptable roles. In her view, gender

expectations are more challenged in college than in high school because when people get to that

stage of their life, they really get a chance to explore, to question, and think critically. She also

highlighted sports as an influential aspect, explaining that boys are often encouraged to

demonstrate physical strength while girls are directed toward less physically aggressive activities.

From her own high school experience, she observed that the size differences in teams reflected

these expectations. For her, these patterns contribute to the societal norms and perceptions of what

is considered appropriate for men and women throughout their lives.

My interview with Ari provided valuable insight into the complex ways gender expectations

influence personal choices, career opportunities, and social experiences, highlighting how men and

women navigate societal norms in different aspects of life. According to her, there is hope for a

society where men and women can freely make their own choices without being constrained by

gender expectations. She observed that younger generations are less influenced by old traditions

and that more people are advocating for themselves. She also expressed interest in contributing to

this change through social media, recognizing its role in shaping opinions. Her reflections

emphasize both the challenges and the possibilities for greater freedom and equality in our

society.